|
***********It's been Awhile********
|
Dec 14, 2009 11:21 am
1016 Views
|
wow...it's really been awhile....i think about IFF often....less and less though....popped in for a sec today just for fun....saw some of the old peeps but a lot of new....
anyways just thought i'd say hi to all my old friends...hope all is well with you. Thanks for the memories and the laughs 
|
|
|
6
Comments
|
|
|
*******I'm Getting Married***********
|
Jun 4, 2009 7:12 am
3769 Views
|
WOW!!!!!......you sure do have 2 wade through a lot of S**T to get here don't you, lol.
But once you find that special someone,...it makes it all worth while...he is well worth the wait,...i'm happy beyond measure...i can see our future dancing before me,..can't wait start forever with him....
 
|
|
|
35
Comments
|
|
|
|
|
*****There be Another Night******
|
Mar 10, 2009 7:13 am
2735 Views
|
The dawn turns love to a wandering soul -
A shattered dream at the end of the night.
By darkness consumed and yet made whole;
The fire extinguished in dousing day's light.
He yearns as bees to buds whilst the sun sleeps;
She desires not but what the stillness holds;
He promises only that none will heap
Upon their passion a will to withold.
They ride the tide of moon's ebb and then flow;
They pray to the heavens for just one more...
That's too much to ask, for the hour doth grow
Inev'table! that parting, crashing door.
The secret whisper sounds as engines thrum -
There be another night once this day's done.
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
|
*******I double dog dare you**********
|
Mar 7, 2009 8:31 pm
2885 Views
|
.....to be yourself.....to come into a room and say what u really feel....wht ur really thinking......i dare you to take off your mask....and show the real you.....who are you?
have you worn the mask long enough where you can't even answer that?....who am I?....am i this person i've become? Does anyone know the real you...what are you afraid of?....one person not liking you....what does that matter with the millions that are out there? surely one won't matter......
do you ever feel weighed down by social niceties?....maybe that's the problem....every society has social norms....if it's someone's birthday you have to wish them a prosperous year, etc etc....when you meet someone on the street it's polite to say hello and ask how their family is etc etc....and if they have bad news you have 2 feign shock and concern and wishes for happier times....all the while all you really want 2 say is "wish i could stay but i really gotta pee".....now that's sincere....that i could buy....
are we so afraid of breaking social norms that we can't be ourselves? sometimes i feel that way.....and i find when i shock people with what i say..it brings a smile to my face...cause i know i haven't conformed...i know i've chosen my own path...
i dislike people who use a lot of words.....to me they are just over speaking to hide their real intent....they flatter and love the sound of their own voice....they talk and talk but never say anything....
i tire of the game....is it a sign of maturity?...who knows...cause i still feel like i'm 16....all i know is i cherish honesty....it is so rare these days....and i'm not saying that i am all the time....i'm not....but i try every day to be more like myself and to not be ashamed of it....i think that is the best you can give of yoursef...your true self...without any apologies....i know i'm in here, somewhere....
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
|
******IT CAN'T ALWAYS BE RAINBOWS AND BUTTERFLIES******
|
Mar 4, 2009 12:30 pm
2999 Views
|
So, there's this guy  ....we've dating for a few months now,....and you know in the beginning things are all rainbows and butterflies....well...at the moment, we've hit a hard spot....he's been going through some tough issues in his life and it's affecting our relationship big time,....i've gone back and forth in my mind what i should do, whether 2 put up with it or leave, give him advice, which he's not so keen on at the moment....i want to do the right thing for him, i want to help but i can't, not because i don't want 2, but because all i can offer is my shoulder and a listening ear, and he needs so much more....he's feeling down and useless as well, and when he gets that way he just wants to be left alone, which is difficult for me 2 deal with cause i want to be there for him....anyway.....my point is that after saying maybe we should take a break...i can't let go of him,...i love him 2 much and so i decided to back off but let him know i'm there when he's ready and i can see that he's getting there and that he's reaching out 2 me when he needs 2 and as i was thinking about this the other day...all this crap we're going through...getting 2 know eachother and what the other needs, etc....struggling....it just makes me love him even more....we're going through a rough patch but we're still together...we haven't given up....and i think working together during these times just makes you stronger as a couple...
....cause everything can't be rainbows and butterflies all the time....
|
|
|
5
Comments
|
|
|
**********Here i go again...................**************
|
Jan 18, 2009 9:26 pm
4384 Views
|
...love is grand....love is awesome.....love is **SiGH** LOVE
i think i've learned to laugh at my fickle heart...as many times as i've been hurt this past year or so..you'd think i would have crawled into a deep dark hole by now..lol...but alas...no....
here i am again...In love.....and man oh man....It's certainly better than that d*MN hole  ....heehee.....
so....a toast to LOVE ...here's to all those who have it....those who want to find it....and those who have been hurt by it but haven't given up.... muuuaaahhhhhssss all around 
|
|
|
26
Comments
|
|
|
RE-post:...JADUGAR ......The Manipulative Magician
|
Dec 7, 2008 9:53 am
13372 Views
|
I've been wrestling with myself these past couple weeks....whether I should write this or not....not because I fear what others may think of me...but because this is out of character for me I guess....those of u who know me know that i'm usually above this kind of blog...usually when someone wrongs me I cry about if for a while in private....maybe vent in a poem or something....and then let it go....which is what I want to do so bad right now...but I also feel a need to warn other women....he's hurt me considerably....and my pain to him means nothing as i've come to realize...so maybe this will prevent someone else from being hurt as I have,....hopefully this will get his attention, that what he is doing is wrong....cause my pain certainly means nothing to him...but then again...
...who am I 2 judge...I am certainly not perfect....I mean...I slept with a married man....why would I do such a thing....a year ago I would have never considered that....
But then I met him...I had just ended a relationship...a very painful breakup....and he made me laugh and forget about it for awhile...we quickly became friends and he seemed to genuinely care for me...I knew he was married....even had a girlfriend.. who I am very sorry I was a part of hurting....but I needed a friend so badly at the time.. and I felt he was so great,...I couldn't help falling in love with him...
Meeting him Delhi two weeks ago was supposed to be the highlight of my trip...gawd....I couldn't wait to see him waiting for me outside the airport...or as I got of the plane...would I recognize him in person...would he me?...what would we do?....I loved playing it out in my mind....I just wanted to touch him...breathe him in....I couldn't wait....he said he would love me forever....that I would always hold a special place in his heart...I loved that he called me Kels,...he was the only one who did...I loved that he loved me for me.. I made him laugh he said...
Reality set in upon arrival in delhi,...it turns out I was just a game 2 him....a toy he could manipulate by using words like love...forever...baby...
I asked what I should do for a hotel in Delhi...he said he would take care of everything...we ended up stayin in a terrible part of town... friends telling me at one point that that is where guys take hookers... the hotel wouldn't let us get a room together.... so we had 2 get separate ones....
I ended up paying for the rooms because he said he lost 20000 rupees on the train while he was on his way to delhi and didn't have ANY money. ... he said someone in his compartment stole it from his bag when he left to go to the bathroom
I ended up paying for the entire hotel stay...our trip to agra, taxi cabs..etc..with the promise he would pay me back in a few days.... which he did.... Rs. 3000 was all he thought he owed me.....now i'm NOT one to be petty about money....but I couldn't believe that that is how one treats a guest who has come to visit and the whole plan revolving around meeting him especially ....when I mentioned my concern for paying for both rooms he suddenly told me his plan 2 leave for home early...
He said I disappointed him...this is AFTER I got home of course....no way would he say it when I was there and possibly miss out on sex... when asked how I had disappointed him he had no answer...which is always the case with him...he will accuse and accuse but will never have anything to back it up with
it's his way of making u feel guilty... like you've done something wrong... and what you would do to get back in HIS good graces....
once he was done with me he said I lied about everything...I still have no answer as to what I lied about....because there is none...I was always honest...especially with him...he made me feel like I could be....but when u ask him for a straight answer.. he runs away & is always EVASIVE ...says forget it ..or
never mind....will talk later... etc etc
how convenient for him...he even said horrible things about me to a friend..AFTER I LEFT INDIA
...this too added to my hurt beyond belief ...how could this person....the one i've trusted and loved for over a year be saying this....wasn't this the guy who just a day ago said he had fallen in love with me....He'd even professed his love for me at another IFF friends home in her prescence! Who was this person?....and how could I have been so wrong?
my point...I guess...after rambling for gawd knows how long is that Jadugar is a first class MANIPULATOR & A PREDATOR ...and women are his medium...he prides himself on how many ladies he has at his disposal, he will never be satisfied with the women in his life...he cares not that his wife knows how unfaithful he is
he finds it amusing actually....how she checks his clothes for hair.. his body for marks etc every time he comes home from a trip... he cares not that he is hurting the other special lady in his life...
He will tell you all sorts of wonderful things....he will ask about your kids and family and all that is dear to you...but he is not the sweet person he makes himself out to be ...the moment it ends up not being in his favor he will turn on you, lie to you, lie about you and blame it all on u.... and wreck your self-esteem and leave ya bleeding on the roadside
which is where I am now...tryin to figure out what happened from the moment I hugged and kissed him goodbye on the side of the road...wishes of love and miss you and maybe just one more night...what happened?...what went wrong?...it sure as hell wasn't me...I will not let him manipulate me into thinking I did this...
so ladies, please...don't get pulled in by his charms...
that's it at the moment till I gather my thoughts and pick up my pieces
|
|
|
129
Comments
|
|
|
"If raindrops fell upon my head...............
|
Sep 19, 2008 9:43 pm
4628 Views
|
"If raindrops fell upon my head, if lightning flashed and thunder said, this is your hour, what will you do? I'd close my eyes and think of you...Minute after minute, til my hour was through"
it's 10:10 PM....2 days since we decided it would be best if we broke all ties.......i can't sleep...i miss him...
....i don't do well with letting go....and i'm not taking this well....how do you fill the HUGE hole left behind.....i've lost my best friend....and you know i'm not going to be depressing although that was what i started out 2 do....not going to sit here and cry....well at least not in here....instead i will celebrate the time we had....
....you know how you meet someone and you just click....that's what we were....instant friends.....and although i am usually an open book...i won't be here....our relationship meant 2 much 2 me.....and although the pain is very real right now...i choose this over never having known him at all.....this past year was that much better with him in it....
so...2 my dear friend:
"Friends Forever Are we friends, Are we not. You told me once, but I forgot. So tell me now and tell me true, So I can say I'm here for you. And if I die before you do, I'll go to heaven and wait for you. I'll give the angels back their wings, And risk the loss of everything. Just to prove my friendship is true, Just to have a friend like you.
...will love you always....
|
|
|
4
Comments
|
|
|
********TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN***********
|
Jun 28, 2008 9:37 am
6106 Views
|
You can have him back.......he's all yours
*************************************************
"the feeling of being O.K.
does not
imply that one has risen above
all his faults & emotional problems.
it merely implies that he/she
refuses
to be paralyzed by them."
I'm not a victim....i just loved.................
|
|
|
3
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (spritelynymph32) use [blog spritelynymph32] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
| |
|
1
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
141
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
31
|
|
|
Most Recent Comments by Others
|
:/
