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Holy Crap
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Aug 1, 2011 2:43 am
633 Views
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A truck was traveling down the highway at around 1 o'clock in the morning near Tulsa, Oklahoma.
Motorcyclist was traveling at ~120mph and ran into the back of the moving semi-truck...
Truck driver said he felt the impact, and it took almost a 1/4 mile for him to pull over.
This is what he found...
[Image]
He lived LUCKILY. Wear your helmet - IT MAY BRING YOU LUCK!!!!!
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Fishing story
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Aug 1, 2011 2:31 am
648 Views
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Dear Dr. Phil,
When I retired, I could hardly wait to spend time enjoying my favorite pastime -- fishing.
I bought my own little fishing boat and tried to get my wife to join me, but she just never liked fishing.
Finally, one day down at the Bait & Tackle Shop, I got to talking to Sam the shop owner who it turned out loves fishing as much as I do. We quickly became fishing buddies.
As I said, the wife doesn't care about fishing. She not only refuses to join us, but she always complains that I spend too much time out on the lake.
A few weeks ago Sam and I had the best fishing trip ever. Not only did I catch the most beautiful bass you've ever seen, only a few minutes later Sam must have caught its twin brother!
So I took a picture of Sam holding up the two nice bass that we caught and showed the picture to my wife, hoping that maybe she'd get interested.
Instead she says she doesn't want me to go fishing at all anymore!
And she wants me to sell the boat!
I think she just doesn't like to see me enjoying myself.
What would you do? Tell the wife to forget it and continue my hobby,
Or quit fishing and sell the boat as she insists?
Thanks,
Deon
P.S. Enclosed is a picture of Sam with the two fish we caught.
[Image]
Dear Deon,
Get rid of that narrow-minded wife.
That's a nice pair of bass!
Sincerely,
Dr. Phil
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Ultimate in Marketing..
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Aug 1, 2011 2:28 am
549 Views
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Aromatic fragrances used to Stimulate sales!
Sense of Freshness....
A while ago a new supermarket opened in Topeka, KS.
It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh.
Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
When you pass the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and you experience the scent of fresh mowed hay.
In the meat department there is the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks with onions.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.
The bread department features the tantalizing smell of fresh baked bread and cookies.
I don't buy toilet paper there anymore.
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As we grow old.......we have......
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Jul 19, 2011 11:17 am
544 Views
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Silver on the Hair......
Gold on the Teeth.....
Stones in the Kidneys and Gall bladder.......
Sugar in Blood......
Lead on the Feet........
Cholesterol in the Arteries.......
[Image]
And an inexhaustible supply of Natural Gas.......
did we ever think that we would accumulate so much of 'wealth'.
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My wife asked me
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Jul 18, 2011 11:43 am
460 Views
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My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?"
I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."
Hospital Visiting Hours are 10 AM to 8 PM
[Image]
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Facts about The killing of Osama Bin Laden:
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Jul 17, 2011 10:53 am
337 Views
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1) Fugitive for 19 years. Hunted by Saudi Arabia , Interpol , Scotland Yard, Mossad, and the CIA.
2) CIA was looking for him for last 14 years. Found him twice and lost him twice. Cost $1.8 Billion
3) CIA had 4 directors over this time period, 1997- 2011. All failed to capture Bin Laden.
4) Obama appoints Leon Panetta son of Italian immigrants as new CIA director April 28th, 2011
5) Mr. Panetta calls in a few favors from friends in New York , New Jersey and Las Vegas on April 29th 2011.
6) They plan a raid over some espresso and cannolis April 30th, 2011. Decide to dress as Navy Seals.
7) Bin Laden is killed (not captured or held for trial) and the body is dumped at sea May 1, 2011. (also known as “swimming with the fishes” in Italian folklore)
 Job done in less then 100 hours: Reward $25,000,000
9) Estimated savings of not having a trial $200,000,000.
10) Political favor handed out: Fiat 500’s go on sale in North America this month.
That’s taking care of business!!
So, DO NOT MESS WITH SONIA GANDHI, OK?
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A seagull in Scotland stealing chips
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Jul 5, 2011 10:52 pm
393 Views
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A seagull in Scotland has developed the habit of stealing chips from a neighborhood shop.
The seagull waits until the shopkeeper isn’t looking (so a camera was installed), and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos.
Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and becomes a feast for other birds!
The seagull’s shoplifting started early this month, when he first swooped into the store in Aberdeen, Scotland, and helped himself to a bag of chips.
Since then, he’s become a “regular”. He always takes the same type of chips. Customers have begun paying for the seagull’s stolen bags of chips because they think it’s so funny!
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To link to this blog (mciafg) use [blog mciafg] in your messages.
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